The only constant in life is change.

Wow, havent touched this space since Jan. So much things have changed since then that I dont even know where to begin. Some changes were good, some were bad and some just not worth mentioning.I feel like these changes took me to places i wish I diidnt go to. Having said that, maybe its all in my mind. After all, the mind works in splendid ways. It tricks you into believing things that arent.

See, im in a bit of a pickle with life at the moment because of the divergence between rationality and emotions. which leads me to question all the whys, for example why things dont ever go smoothly? and do all people have moments where they feel this way. -im sure they do. To be honest, its very simple if i was a shape shifter and im beginning to feel im becoming one.

Well, hopefully, good change comes real soon without me making any decisions though i am aware that this is just wishful thinking. Decisions decisions, so hard to make decisions. So here i am left asking myself what is the outcome of this, what have I learnt from it and how can i make it better?

1. Ive become more independent. Stronger? Doubt it.
2. I have a better idea of what kind of person I want
3. I have a better understanding of how certain things can work.
4. To improve, I should work on saying no, being too accommodating and flexible.

Okays meeting a friend for coffee. Signing offx

Happy New Year!

Firstly, HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Too bad i'm 12 days late. hehheh

Lets start with some reflections about 2011.

[in no chronological order]

The pros:

• Graduated
• Gained lots of working experience
• Made really good friends at uni
• Became better friends with my workmates
• Went to Vietnam (finally)
• Km&Dan came to Melbourne for a long holiday (3 months)
• Got back with J
• J came to Melbourne (again)
• Celebrated New Year with one of my best friends -first time in Melbourne too
• Rediscovered my passion for fine dining (Il Solito Posto, The Italian, France-Soir, Longrain)
• Fell in love with breakfast (St Ali, Dukes, Proud Mary, Mart 130, Mocha Joe)
• Tried my first macaron (La Belle Miette)

The cons:

• Broke up with J
• Spend a little too much on cheap wine/ciggs
• Worried about unnecessary things in life

Life is good, so far...so i decided to start 2012 with a BANG!

For example, I have:

• Cut out excessive drinking (Excused on my birthday - I chucked 3 times!)
• Completely stopped smoking including those occasional social puffs
• Lost a whole heap of weight (3kgs!) -Though i might have gained it back by lashing out on $13, 300g steak DAYUM!

So anyway, J's just left but he was down in Melbourne for New year and my birthday. I was uber excited because I got to celebrate the New Year with Karren and it was my/our first time watching fireworks in Melbourne. The fireworks was terrible though. I felt it didn't have enough 'pizzazz' to light up the sky -so to speak. But my birthday was awesomest! I felt i truly accomplished something this year even though it was not spent with Km (Don't judge me!). Yes, I planned everything and even had a theme, bought a sailorette costume and everything. Worst I thought nobody was gonna show and it would have been just Karren, J and I but almost everyone came so it was awesome fun (lest the vodka shots) -which is mainly the reason why i chucked 3 times. I also had pre-birthday drinks with my workmates -that was swell too. I got many gifts (Longchamp baggie from J, 2 bracelets from my workmates and macarons from my good friends) and had the longest talk with Km while J was in the toilet which sorta made up for the fact that we didn't celebrate our birthdays together (first time in 4 years!) -thats okay though cz we are having a tea party mad hatter style (trust Km).

So all in all my Jan bag was filled with awesomeness!

Okay so here we go about J n I. I'm not going to go into detail about what or how it all 'happened'really because even I am not too sure about how it 'happened'. Long story short, we went on a holiday and I was happy and decided why not. awe...

There was this once J called me a miser (which i never forgot) and to be honest, I really am one. shy* Truth is, i love bargain hunting and you can trust me to never pass up on a bargain when i see one. Now this fact absolutely frustrates J because he knows there is no stopping a girl on a mission.

So on the last day before he left (that's 2 days ago), he took me shopping. Now typically, shopping for a girl is just one shopping centre OR one strip of shops but not me. I like to be 'creative' with my shopping (that's also due to my short attention span/impatience). We went to Chaddy first up and found nothing then the city where I paid for my bag - Finally i have it :D We proceeded to have dinner and because I also have a bad sense of direction, I took him on a merry goose chase to find a Thai restaurant which was closed. Yep but J was so understanding -well not really. I could almost see his fumes coming out but he kept it 'under the lid'. (It was pretty far...about 20 minutes walk - I would be pissed too. See above for reasoning). I then decided Hey why dont we have Korean instead. I mean you like Korean...(trying to diffuse the timebomb and get him to walk another say 5 blocks?) but he flatly refuse and said No, we are going to Big Mamas (That place is shit btw -especially what tasted like caramelised salty chicken they call spicy chicken) And if that wasn't enough, after dinner, the poor boy had to tell me that he needed to get his mother some cream. I was thinking swell (sucker), I could get him to another shopping avenue! (This was 9pm already mind you and trust me, J was in no mood for shopping). But hell yeah we went in and while I was looking/picking out shoes I wanted to buy, (much to my surprise) J comes over with 2 himself. I made a shopaholic out of him! Total damage: $45 for 4 pairs. We were happy campers for the night!

Well, there is no moral to this story but as you can see, he is really my partner in crime. What I mean is we are compatible right down to the bargain hunts (Betcha didn't know that didya J).

What Im trying to say is 2012 is gonna be awesome because J's gonna be around. So here is to a HAPPY NEW YEAR with you!

Cheerio xoxo

tiffany and co.

im not a big fan until XXX told me about this!

so pretty!

i want this ring! but sadly..the sterling silver one has sold out..

and the platinum with diamonds ring cost $3000 aud wtf

i think ill wait until i get married.

theres a necklace and bracelet too! Yummy

The road not taken

Ive hit a fork road in my life.

Part of me just wants to stay there but i know i cant forever.

The hardest thing was deciding which road to choose

As my eyes do not allow me to see which is the right path.

Will it be better? Im not sure.

Will it make me stronger? Perhaps.

Will i learn more? I hope so.

The only thing I'm sorry for is that I couldn't have it all.

_______________________________________________________

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost, 1915.

PCK & Harith

Hillarious