pkfaced.

Yesterday, I was just having a look at the chanel store & i saw the white bag which i want. So anyway, today i decided that maybe I could/should layby it. I mean Ive been working heaps and i guess i can put a down payment and pay it off slowly in the next couple of months...smart thinking right? not. Guess what I received in the mail today? BILLS. effin car rego, insurance, parking permit. all up 2k. thank you very much. there goes my down payment for x1 chanel bag. Anyway, its been some hectic weeks! I didn't realize I was working 3 day weeks/rushing assignments & procrastinating whilst trying to study. Need to up my ante. btw, andy is such a cutey. xx

ps. j, if you read the last msg widgie, u'd find that the bitch aka me gets a free rose. can i request for baby pink? (:

source: ps, lj, panotes, mycamera.

bffs

burrberry ss10 i love you. give me your skirts&dresses.

the mad race.

did you guys read about the earthquake in haiti?
or that churches around malaysia are being targeted for hate crime?
what about the recent attempted bombings which caused an uproar amongst different countries?
canada and nz have both increased their airport security in attempts to combat terrorism.
what is the world turning into and when will it stop?
it seems as if we are losing the battle against both mother nature and the fanatics.

the world used to be a better place, 10 years ago.
i remember i used to be able to go to parks without any quelms.
now, i dash out to my car whilst looking left and right and once immediately inside, i lock myself in.
i curious to see whats going to happen in the next 10 years?

bored, so i re-tell my life story.

hm. not sure what to write today but i did feel like havin a go. right now, im currently tuned in to the 6 music cds i bought from the pm last weekend. its nice. im really happy people actually remembered my birthday. thanks so much guys. i know i am an insensitive b*tch lol but okay ill try to make it up to everyone. anyway, i was glad that i had a h2h that night too. i found out incredulous things that i never knew before, like how it didnt matter that everyone messages you happy birthday but if that one important person that matters the most doesnt do something special at 11:59pm, that hurts the most. it doesnt even matter if they try to make up for it on the actual day cz it just doesnt cut it.

ok time for an inside joke.
im really happy. ive decided i wanna get married at 29 (pls dont ask me why such an auspicious number) and i also wanna buy a house before that, in particular, a double storey terrace worth ard 700k and pay it off within 7 years. "some people" may not believe in my capabilities (ok i guess its a little hard to do) after i heard the cold hard facts but still let me be in my lala land can? and yes i also do not want my "temple" to be tainted. so i guess that cancels out ppl staying there and paying rent over the next 7 years. picky much? yea i reckon. anyway, i think dreams can be realized if i really work hard towards it. ive got determination ok..just sometimes a lil depressed/very lazy thats all but overall im so uber grateful that i can be an "ïndependant woman" so to speak.

on top of that, i want to get married at the convention centre close by to bkt kiara. its uber pretty and have pink+white roses and pink champagne + hennessy gathered together in a small gathering surrounded by my family and closest of friend (that means bffs). ok la perhaps im a girly girl so i like the colour pink but never really admitted it (and plus the fact that i found out that my fav flower (maybe cz its the flower for the dead) is the most expensive flower) what a shocker right. and why doesnt anyone believe me/take me seriously when i tell them the truth but when i lie then everyone is like wahwahwah. ok i swear maybe i am a born liar, one who has no idea that lying can save your life. seriously, you should watch the invention of lying. its a goood movie.

also, i dont understand why ppl keep laughing when i say fml?? whats so funny bout it. i think its quite a catchy phrase (ever since the sibling introduced me to the wonders of fml last spring), i fell in love with it and ive been an avid user of that expression. fml right not?

this is my fav song atm. i heard it a long time ago so its vv old but still so uber yummy. for those who dont know chinese history and because im such a history buff, i shall give you a low down on who/what is "liang shan bo and zu ying tai". basically, to put in it simple terms, they are like the romeo and juliet of the east. zu ying tai is kinda like mulan, they fall in love lalala you get the picture. have a listen. i love it, so you'd better love it.



ok another thing is im starting to love this singer. he is freaking awesome and he is a sabahan. omg. listen to this song.


other songs of his on my play list is the top 3 songs on his supermarket album.

and lastly i watched this movie which was so uber good, love happens. what a tear jerker.

escapism.

just remember that you're talking to me though
i mean after all the things that we've been through
i mean after all the things that we got into
how could you be so dr evil?
you're bringin out a side of me that i don't know

in the night i hear em talk coldest story ever told
somewhere far along this road he lost his soul
to a woman so heartless.

What a year 2009 has been, both rough and exciting for me. Ive seen so many things, done too many fuck ups, realized, fell down and picked up, only to achieve, well, im starting to question this sense of achievement (or lack thereof). what did/have i achieved? that i manage to survive yet another year? oh wow. sense of biggie achievements. lets not talk merits because merits are constant and achievable, however, thats dependant on whether you are up for the challenge. 2009, i lost love ones, got heartbroken, started from scratch, made new friends, reconnected, got a new job, tried to put a little bit of structure into my discorded world in order to get a grip of reality, did i failed? i hope not. i dont know why when it get closer to my birthday, all i feel is so miserable and i need a little bit of "me time" to pick myself up. i just wonder whether its a bad thing not to tell you my thoughts? instead, i just feel like i need to vent but i dont know how or to who and thats evident cz none of my thought are coming out. i was so excited bout the next year, my thoughts were that it would be bigger, it would be better. but coming into the new year, i find myself very lost and dissapointed with the circumstances ive put in front of me and the circumstances i have as of now. im an overachiever and i think i may have overreached my capacity. now im tired. life is good but there is something wrong with the pictures. it seems to be telling me with unspoken words that the sparkles my eyes created in photographs were telling lies and the lines on my face blurred. what a rough year it has been, yes. and coming into this new year, boy it has been rough too.

so this year, my birthday wish this year is pls, someone pump me full with liquid dreams.

your greatest dreamer,
steph
xx

public apology.

i ran my mouth off a bit too much what did i say??
and we'll all float on okay (:

dearest j,

you are a girl's best friend. forever okay??
anyway, cant believe i hung up on you yesterday. worst, i cant believe you got angry at me.
so if you are still angry (which i think you are cz you are a super siu hei master which only know how to tell me all the bad shit about me), im sorry.
anw, i cant understand why when i get scared, i start to avoid the whole situation altogether. quite bad right? i know. but then i started to think about it and (insert own sentences)
so, still on for karaoke with my cousins?
on top of that, i cant believe we are going on a roadtrip! exciting.
happyhappyhappyhappyhappyhappy. 99999999999999999999. opportunity year.
come let me rub some of my opportunity on you.

love, steph.

Happy New Year 2010.
came home drunk.

I feel so restless today.
and i just dont know what to do with you.

what to do on my bday?! eek!

nitey xoxo